So I’ll Sit Here and Drink without You

alone with the waves

You lied to me today
Held my hand while you kissed me and
Tied the ends of your story
In tangled webs
Around me
The glow of your phone in the middle of the night
Telling a bedtime story
I wasn’t ready for
Emotions eviscerated by winking emoticons
Deception shredding the fabric of trust
Our fairy tale collapsing in rust
Eaten
Hollowed
Savaged
And left for dust
While each touch
Left me marooned
Cocooned
Isolated
From the heart you’d been silently burying
Behind your perfect smile
And the laughing eyes
Your perfect disguise
For the new life you’d already begun
While our bridges burned
And rivers turned
With blood and the carcasses of our dreams
Phantasmic scrawls etched on diary pages
Blurred with the shuddering rages
My soul can only scream
So I’ll walk alone tonight
To prove I can
Take down that perfect bottle
Disregarding the plan
I had to surprise you
Because you beat me to
The punch
Shoulda checked my blindspot
Listened to the hunch
I knew
And so I’ll sit here and drink without you.
-ijs

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